“So we’re doing this!” I reminded myself at random points of time on days 4 and 5…we are in fact going on a long trip, with our children.
Initially it felt like we were going for a regular old camping trip. We drove from Portland to Medford, OR. Then Medford to Red Rocks Trail, CA. Then CA to Beatty, NV. Just traveling from roadside camp to camp.
But something changed when we passed through Death Valley that fourth day.
Perhaps it was the grandeur of a National Park (NP). Perhaps it was that we figured out how to better level Adela’s bunk bed. Or most likely, the girls tantrums were getting more predictable, meaning we were figuring out how to feel more comfortable in the daily routines traveling was pushing us into.
But what made it so I finally accepted we were doing THIS? Maybe each mile allowed me to let go of all the societal expectations I’ve put on myself. This trip is OK too. You don’t have to raise your children doing routine activities for 10 months of the year. It’s OK to let the kids run around the front yard while I take care of garden tasks. I think I was finally allowing myself to let the joy seep in, deeply. And that allowed me to feel this trip is real.
There is no way around it, these first several days on the road have been very successful yet exhausting. Todd has been driving an average 250 miles a day. I am SO EXTREMELY GRATEFUL for his tenacity. I also managed to get the girls’ cold so I’m feeling unusually low energy. But we are excited knowing we are going to be traveling, not just camping.
It is also unfulfilling for us to drive past beautiful spots. Places that would be fun for the girls to climb on or places where we could enjoy dusk approach and watch the light change on the mountain side. Instead, right now we are racing to our campsites for the night.
Thankfully we did take a day (day 3) in Death Valley visiting the sand dunes and salt flat, which is at the lowest elevation of North America, -281 ft below sea level! You just feel so tiny and insignificant in amongst geology like this.
The girls have been amazingly patient with us. We say “5 more mins before we stop to go pee”-a lot. (Adela is now calling us out on it!!) We are more honest and say “33 more mins till we find our campsite. That’s 10, 10, 10, and 3. Or 3 groups of 11!” But I can see that their physical ability to sit in an upright car seat is dwindling. And we still have 5 solid days of driving and the border crossing in the next 2 days.
I succumbed to snacks pretty quickly- I can’t bear to hear them say they’re hungry and not do anything about it. I walk the 4 feet between our seats frequently. I hand them new coloring books or try to inspire them to draw in their travel journals. But really, they are entertaining one another with pretend kitty games, remembering that time about Owen’s smelly socks, and then once in a while screaming at the other for taking the toy they wanted.
Our meal situation was looking pretty good as we had 2 leftover cooked meals from home and lots of veggies. Snacks are still looking amazing! Cashews, Pocky sticks, and pretzels. Or carrots, cucumbers, and cheese slices. Dehydrated mango (Adela’s FAVE), flake cereal, and peanuts.
But our meals are getting thin. We avoided buying new produce until yesterday. I spent $28 at a convenience store for 5 sad apples, 1 cucumber, 3 mini zucchinis, 4 andouille sausages, 1 lb of dried great northern beans, and 6 very ripe bananas. We were smack in the middle between Death Valley NP and Mojave Desert National Monument. Taking this route because we were trying really hard to save ourselves from having to drive 60 additional highway miles.
I thought I would make apple pancakes with yogurt, pressure cooked beans with sausage and potatoes, a packaged coconut curry with beans, fried pesto gnocchi with beans. What I actually made- apple pancakes with yogurt, pressure cooked beans with mustard, sausage and potatoes with rotisserie chicken, and a spinach, apple, chicken salad.
We snacked on the bananas, cucumber, sautéed zucchini, and apples with peanut butter. I was proud of myself!
We did many border crossings in South America and the frustration of throwing out produce, meat, lentils, beans, or any cooked food is exasperating to me. So we are eating down those items and buying just what we need to get through the border smoothly. It’s a fun game and I think the meals have actually been great.
There have been MANY moments of frustration these first couple of days (the van is really small when it’s cold outside), but we are voicing this to the girls when we notice we’re having a hard time as parents.
I find that when I tell the girls I’m frustrated about the cab heater malfunctioning on us on the 23F degree night #3, it normalizes frustration for them and how to deal with it. We’re also taking time to talk about what to expect the next day (drive, playground? maybe library, then drive again for a loooooong time). It definitely ain’t perfect, but would it really be any less frustrating at home?